5 Steps to Create Your 5-Minute Daily Self-Care Practice for Managing Holiday Grief

By Heather Stang, MA, C-IAYT

Posted: October 29, 2024

5 Tips to Create Your 5-Minute Daily Self-Care Practice for Managing Holiday Grief

Self-care for holiday grief doesn’t have to be complicated or take up a lot of energy or time. Even just five minutes can help you give your mind a break from painful rumination, anxiety, and worry. The key is to craft something that works for you, which I will walk you through in the 5 simple steps below.

Finding Calm in the Holiday Season

The holiday season can stir overwhelming and often unpredictable emotions when you are grieving. You may start with a general sense of dread, yet as celebrations and gatherings draw closer, the pressure may continue to build.

Establishing a quick, daily self-care ritual—one that takes just five minutes or less—can offer you a moment of relief and reset without adding to an already demanding schedule. It will allow you to honor your feelings and fortify your resilience through the season.

This activity is part of my Grief-Sensitive Holiday Planner, which will help you feel more empowered and less overwhelmed this holiday season. 

Why a Daily 5-Minute Practice?

Five minutes a day is manageable, even on your busiest days, and it creates a consistent rhythm of self-care. With this foundation, you can then add one longer self-care activity weekly, and a monthly outing to deepen your sense of peace and renewal.

5 Steps To Create Your 5-Minute Holiday Grief Practice

Step 1. Set Your Intention for Self-Care

An intention grounds your practice with purpose and helps you stay focused. Your intention can be based on what you need, such as, “May I find peace today” or “May I feel compassion for myself in this moment.” You can keep the same intention each day or adjust it to meet specific challenges, such as finding the courage to attend (or say no to) a holiday event or equanimity for a difficult conversation. Say your intention aloud or silently. This will set the tone for the practice and help you align with what you need most at that moment.

Step 2. Ground Yourself

Grounding allows you to transition from daily busyness into the calm of your self-care practice. This simply means connecting to your present moment awareness. There are several ways you can do this. All you have to do is pay attention to what is happening now. Choose one technique below, or create your own:

  • Breath Focus: Take slow, deep breaths, focusing on each inhale and exhale.
  • Body Scan: Gently notice each part of your body, allowing any tension to soften wherever possible.
  • Sensory Awareness: Notice what you see, hear, smell, taste, and/or feel, acknowledging that you are experiencing this in the present moment.
  • Mantra or Word: Choose a grounding word like “calm” or “steady,” repeating it quietly to bring your focus inward.

Step 3. Engage With Your Practice

This is where you spend a few minutes in whatever self-care practice you find most supportive. There’s no single “right” activity—what matters is that you do whatever you choose with a caring, open attitude. Here are a few ideas:

  • Mindfulness Meditation: Observe your thoughts, senses, and emotions, letting them come and go without judgment.
  • Self-Compassion Practice: Direct kindness toward yourself, especially if you deeply feel grief.
  • Gratitude Reflection: Spend a moment acknowledging something that brings you comfort or that you are grateful for, even amid sadness.
  • Journaling: Write a few lines about what you’re feeling without censoring or editing.
  • Mindful Walking: Take one step after another, paying attention to the motion of your body.
  • Movement or Self-Massage: Gentle stretching or massaging areas of tension can be incredibly soothing.

The goal is to allow yourself to be as you are without judgment. Each of these practices encourages self-compassion and curiosity, inviting you to be present with your grief in a healing way.

Step 4: Reflect on Your Self-Care Experience

This step is about making the practice meaningful and helping you integrate its benefits. By reviewing the experience before you go about your day, you build a stronger awareness of what supports you and helps you feel more peace. Take a moment to consider:

  • Your Intention: How did it feel to focus on that intention? Did anything shift within you?
  • Notice Changes: Reflect on how you feel now compared to the beginning of your practice. Is there a sense of lightness, calm, or perhaps deeper understanding?
  • Personal Insight: Did anything stand out to you during the practice? How will this awareness impact how you treat yourself today?

Step 5: Journal About Your Experience

Recording even just a few lines about your practice in your grief journal can be a powerful way to see patterns in your feelings and track subtle shifts over time. Even if it’s only a brief note each day, you’ll gain insight into your process, which can be especially meaningful during the holidays.

Build a Weekly and Monthly Self-Care Routine

To complement your daily practice, consider setting aside an hour each week for a deeper self-care activity, like attending a support group, practicing yoga, or taking a long walk.

Once a month, carve out a few hours to go somewhere peaceful or engaging, whether that’s a park, museum, or cozy coffee shop. These added moments of care will give you a break from the holiday whirlwind and allow space for renewal.

Closing Thoughts

Navigating grief during the holidays doesn’t have to mean isolating yourself or enduring it in silence. A simple, consistent daily practice can bring you peace and help you cope with the unique challenges of this season.

Take a step forward in your journey by joining our Awaken Online Grief Support Program, where you’ll find community, resources, and support to help you navigate grief with compassion and resilience.

Heather Stang, MA, C-IAYT

About the author

Heather Stang, M.A. is the author of Living with Grief and the guided journal, From Grief To Peace. She is the creator of the Mindfulness & Grief System that is featured in the Handbook of Grief Therapies (2023) and is the founder of Awaken, a mindfulness-based online grief support group. Heather also hosts the Mindfulness & Grief Podcast, and offers mindfulness-based grief support online through her organization, the Mindfulness & Grief Institute. She holds a Masters degree in Thanatology (Death, Dying, and Bereavement) from Hood College in Maryland, and is a certified Yoga Therapist. She currently lives in Falling Waters, WV.

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